abnormalizes | Seasons: IC Contact/Continuations

I've literally never thrown a party that wasn't sex-related.

[...]

Due to lack of experience with other parties, or...?

I mean, I've been invited to normal birthday parties? And holiday parties a couple times?

Well, yes, but have you really not held a single one?

Both the birthday parties I've held for myself here have been orgies. Rinku was in charge of my all-ages one this year. And I never held or attended any parties in the City.

Hm. I see.

In that case, as a non-practicing therapist [sir don't make it sound like a religion] I suggest perhaps a dinner party, or something equally small and intimate with friends.

Such gatherings are important, Ol Siaion. They allow you to see your importance to others even without the benefits attached.
It's easy to tell oneself that you are loved, and that there are many people who love you... but it is something else entirely to see just how many people will show up at your doorstep merely to enjoy a meal and chat with you.

I hang out with friends individually all the time! That doesn't count?

The point is seeing them all together in one place, Evangeline.
It's the difference between "there are ten contacts on my phone that I have lunch with sometimes" and "there are ten whole people in my home, whom all arrived of their own volition, merely to talk and share a meal with me".
Does that make sense?

I have object permanence, I know they exist when I can't see them...?

[...

He has to put his phone down for a moment, hang on. Y'know, put it on the table, look out for the window for a second.
Ponder.

...

But, okay, no --]

Darling, dearest Evangeline, whom I adore so much. I am not saying that you lack object permanence.
Merely that it is a good way to remind yourself that you have so many people who care about you for so many reasons.

And, speaking as a non-practicing therapist [- stop?? -] I feel it is also important to give you that without the context of sex involved with it.

Please remember that you struggled with the idea of me giving you compliments that had nothing to do with how sexually attractive you are.

I'm not arguing with that. I know I definitely still think of sex first when it comes to things I offer of value in a friendship. But, okay, a party. Don't I still need some kind of occasion?

Not at all. That is why I suggested something like a small dinner party; there are plenty of people who hold such gatherings merely because they can, after all.
Frankly, I'm surprised Lycaon hasn't yet. He seems the type. I might bring that up with him.

Anyway, though, parties aren't some sacred thing reserved for holidays. Hell, you could even make a holiday to celebrate, if you wanted to. Those aren't sacred, either.
All that matters is that you wish to see your friends and treat them to something fun.

Huh. The fact that I'm really reluctant to do this is probably more evidence that I should.

Indeed, it is. And, frankly, I'm impressed that you recognize that.
Most people don't. They see their own mental resistence as a sign that they shouldn't pursue something at all, even if it would be worth it to them in the end.

In fact, the thought of "I'm reluctant to do this, thus, I should do it" is a prevailing way to tackle social anxiety in the moment.
The fear or discomfort or whatever else is often outweighed by the benefits in the end, after all.

You have to do things that are uncomfortable or scary if you want to grow. That's how it worked for me with dating. ...Okay, but not right now. You've got your birthday, then next month is holiday stuff, and February is my birthday... Maybe January if nothing big happens to get in the way?

Exactly. Not all growth comes from hardship, but sometimes hardship is necessary to remove blockages preventing your growth.
Like removing asphalt so wildlife can return in its place.

That said, January would be a lovely time for something like that. It's often empty and boring, merely a "stopgap" month before February.
Most everyone would be thankful for something to do.

[well, immediate RIP to her party plans, considering "everyone gets musical-hypnotized and her sister falls into a coma" feels pretty big and party-stifling,]

[Little bit!! She may still need some de-stressing, but not by a party.]

I'll pencil it in then! Maybe I'll cook something vegan.

Well. If your boyfriend attends, you may not have to worry about cooking vegan?

It was your idea, I can't just not invite you.

Yes, but what of our restrictions? Your other option would be to not invite your own boyfriend.
I wouldn't want you to hold a nice dinner party yet be forced to leave him out of it.

I understand that and I would feel bad about leaving him out, but I would also feel bad about leaving you out?

Then we are going to continue in circles? Our restriction cannot be lowered unless both parties agree to it, and I would rather not do that.

[...

There's a moment, here, though, where the "goated is typing..." bubble pops up for a moment or so. But eventually...]

Then again. I have recently come into possession of a way to override my own in-built control via my name.
However, I have yet to test it, as I would rather not test it while I am alone. And if I'm to test name-control, I'd need someone here to help with that, anyway...

Would you say you're currently free?

I am! Want me to come right over?

Yes and no. I would like you to come right over, but I am, admittedly, not at my suite.
Rather, I'm in the Gardens over in Blossomcrown. Would you care to join me here?

One sec!

[After a couple minutes, she shows up in the gardens, dressed appropriately cute.]

Hi, honeybug.

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